April 13, 2004
-
Violated. Fucked in the ass. Standing in the hallway naked.
That's me right now. You'll notice that all of my entries on Xanga are private for now. Why, you ask?
After 7 years of online journaling on MDD, someone from my old company (yes, the one I just left) thought it would be funny to discover my online journal. No confirmation yet as to who it was or how they found it, but they did. And made it common knowledge. I have my suspiscions - the only fucking guy in that company that doesn't EVER work and loves to make a spectacle out of anyone else's life so that he can feel better about himself. My readers that have been with me a long time know who I'm talking about. I refuse to mention names.
Regardless, I was informed of this little tidbit of info around 3:30 p.m. when I got home from my day out with Mike. This is the email I received from him upon walking in the door:
I just was looking over my e-mail and I got a heads up from someone that shared with me a website that apparently is common knowledge at Novoste... (Insert link to Andi's MDD diary here).
There is stuff in this diary I was hoping would be just between you and I...
If you don't mind...I would appreciate it if you wouldn't add details of our relationship to the public especially people that I know and work (ed) with...
I haven't felt panic like that since the trial first started. After many conversations with Mike, it's been determined that our friendship is in no way harmed. I HATE more than anything that them finding and reading this diary doesn't just affect me, it affects everyone else in my life at that company. And I know Mike doesn't work there anymore either, but we both have friends there. And now everyone knows about our 'relationship' and his financial help.
I know that it's technically common knowledge, but why would someone do this? I was soooo upset up until about an hour ago. Many tearful phone calls to both Mike and Kelly.
And now, fuck 'em. If my life is that interesting, then by all means, read. They'll get all the trial news, bisexual news, recent sexcapades news, breakup news... all the details of my life that NO ONE in my real life ever got - not even Kelly, and we were together over 5 years.
My feeling is that Marketing will be sitting there laughing at me with the turn of every page. But you know what? I can guarantee that my life has been more exciting and fulfilling than any of theirs.
So, the point of this entry is to say that I am leaving MDD after 7 years. I will only be posting on Xanga, but they will be protected posts. If you don't see any other entries here besides this one, you don't have access.
If you would like access, leave me a message and tell me who you are, and if you know me from Xanga or MDD. I know I had a lot of readers that read and never commented. But I refuse to stop writing, and now I have to be extra careful about who I give access.
If you are on my SIR list, you already have access. I'll try to go back through my subscription list and add those that I know are readers. If you don't have access yet, please don't take it personally. I'll add you if you request it.
Thanks for your support in this. I'm baffled and pissed. I hope the culprit remembers that what goes around, comes around.
Seems I can't leave any job without being a legend anymore...
~Andi
Comments (51)
God, Andi - I'm so sorry! Keep me on your list, if you will. It's so surprising what comes up with searches, and it sucks that someone is using it against you. Are you going to get your MDD site downloaded and deleted? I can help, if you like.
On another note...thank you SO much for the card - that little tidbit came at a very perfect time when I needed a pick-me-up. You are a jewel.
What an ass. I can't believe that person revealed your website. Do you have any idea how it was discovered?
I am so sorry. I know what it feels like and it's not good. I love being protected, though, on an upside.
That totally sucks. I'm so sorry.
Ick- that's shit!! Thanks for havin me on the list, though.
Holy f*ing shit. I am really really sorry... I came through your site by way of DanesArmyWife, but remember coming through by others in the past by whose I can't remember. I have totally enjoyed your writing. GREAT reading! Could I join your protected list?
More and more, I worry about something like this happening to me. Busted by one of the hens at work or something as gruesome. If you will, please keep me or add me to your list. I was turned on to you by Dasha at MDD (redzcript here) and you are among my favorites. I'm sorry this happened to you.
Grrr... I hate it when people do that. I was reading under a different name until someone "discovered" me, so I understand how you feel.
I would love to be on your list. Your writings have inspired my very sad life as of late. I am so in awe of how you have taken charge of what life has handed you.
I hope the asshole that did this to you finds the karma that will kick his ass soon.
wow youre leaving your job of 7 years because someone got to your xanga? somethings wrong with that.
OMG, I can't believe that happened. What an asshole. He deserves to be stripped to the buck, then tarred and feathered, at work. I'm sorry that happened to you. I know you're not ashamed of your life story, but it is not cool for someone to publicize it with people that know you and may silently pass their judgments. I think I'm on your protected list, since I saw the picture posted a while back, but I'm not on your SIR, so just in case, I hope you'll include me----> Justabum. I started reading you when you used to be on the MWA blogring.
Oh my...that sucks girlfriend. I am sorry this happened to you. I'm not sure if I am on your protected list...but I've been reading you for years now, since MDD. Please put me on the list if I'm not already. (((hug)))
I agree with sorrowfulheart, I hope Karma kicks them in the ass, too!!
Holy crap Andi. This is actually one of my worst nightmares. I am so paranoid, I never even access Xanga unless I am at home. I don't always comment, but I almost always read. One of the things I really like about Xanga is the ability to post your entries as protected or private, so I am really glad you have that option and keep writing. Hopefully I can be on the list.
(shrugs) Well honey, it's the MAIN reason I left, and I got tracked down as well....
And it's nice to see we both had the SAME reaction! FUCK'EM! It's OURS! Not THEIRS! So they can kiss our collective ass! Amen, L'Chaim, and as I told ElleBelle, Pass the Southern Comfort!
Wishing you well, and a "Kerriganing" to the bastage's knee.
Oh honey - I have SO been down this route. It's unnerving, to say the least. Reading someone else's diary, shouldn't that have gone out when they got out of 5th GRADE??? Anywho, I know I don't comment much anymore, but I do read. So keep me on the list.
What a jerk! I haven't been commenting much either with going to Italy and now being sick. Hang in there.(am I always saying that?) Well, I mean it, this too shall pass. Hold your head high. Hugs!!!
Andi I am so sorry. You must feel so violated. Your diary has given me so much inspiration especially since I can relate to a lot of things that you have gone through over the years. You have become like a personal friend to me! Please hang in there and do know that you have lots of "real" friends who support you and care about you. My e-mail address is greygooseteeny@yahoo.com
I am so furious, devastated, pissed off, etc. I know exactly where you are coming from, as I was violated on my last MDD diary. I understand what your feelings are completely. Fuck 'em. If there is anything I can do to help you seek vengeance, let me know.
That sentence sounded scary. Hugs to you, don't ever stop writing.
Btw, don't know if you have all ready or not, but email Mark right away and he can removed the diary. That's the best thing about Xanga vs. MDD, you can do that stuff yourself.
P.S. Again, you probably know this, but once he removes it, you will still have access to it. Girl, hurry, don't let those vultures keep reading!
Agh! Don't forget me-I'm still reading. What a mess, eh? Don't let them bring your happiness level down, you've been amazing lately!
Oh Andi, I am so sorry to hear this! But hey? You don't work there anymore and I don't remember reading anything terrible about anyone who you ARE friends with so screw it ya know? It's all you and if people can't take it then i say they weren't friends to begin with. Let it go, and say fuck 'em!!!
I am so sorry this happened, Andi, and I totally know what it feels like! My BOSS from my last company did the SAME thing to me... and eventually even sent it to Lori's girlfriend's EX so that she could try to "prove" that Riki cheated on her... blah, blah, blah... I've never felt so used and so disrespected before! It's a terrible feeling...
...but this, too, shall pass. I'm glad you will keep posting! I'd miss you!
good lord, girl - i know how you feel - not with the work, but when the entire bar found my first xanga site - and there wasn't such a thing as protected posts.
You have a good attitude about it - fuck em - let em think of you as a legend.
((hugs))
Andi - I hate to sound like an ass (but I am), so I must say this:
I don't think you should worry too much about the fact that people that you didn't want to gain access to your personal life were able to b/c you posted it for the world to see (hence -- the terminology: world wide web). It doesn't take too much digging if you leave all of your yahoo information on the computer that you were working on (which it sounds like you did)… You should put your focus/concerns on the fact that you do post your diary on-line for others to read and you involved people that do care for you (and take care of you) and you put their personal lives out on the net for others to read as well… so don’t get angry at the readers… they are doing exactly what you want them to do – otherwise, you wouldn’t post it… if there is anyone to blame… look within. I would like to share a quote that I hold dear to me (my gift to you):
“Every person, all the events of your life are there because you have drawn them to you. What you choose to do with them is up to you.” – Richard David Bach
So stop whining, get over it, and most of all – GET YOURSELF TOGETHER!
Good luck and God Bless. I will keep you in my prayers – b/c I truly believe you need it.
Featured Content
HIDE 10:09 PM
MissHollyGolightly 7:01 PM
tjthunderball 4:36 PM
xRaZZiEx 6:49 PM
SlomoUofR 8:22 PM
more featured content
thats soo fucking gay, i mean who ever is its really needs to get a goddamn life i mean thats like.. UGH!.. stupid fuckface(s).. *sigh* hope you find out whoever it is!
sheila--*
"Violated" because you invited and welcomed it.
"Fucked in the ass" because you spread your cheeks and bent over.
"Standing in the hallway naked" because you stripped down and waited.
"what goes around, comes around" - so how's it feel now that it's coming on you?
Thats straight messed up wicked.
I know how that feels when you think you are sharing things on a restricted basis and in the end it becomes common knowledge. id like to keep up with the life of Andi,so hopefully ill be able to access your future entries
Andi,
I just enjoy reading your Xanga site. Could I please be placed on your protected list?
Are you not posting lately or am I not on the list? I better be on the list!
I miss you!
Hmm. seems MrIncompetent finally realises the truth - and that's fine - seems he's also upset because has figured out that people know the truth about him...
Sheesh...
Honestly, with very few exceptions, everything that I post here is something that I don't mind telling people, once I have it straight in my own head.
BTW - I left him a nasty gram in his guest book, and reported his happy ass for abuse...
You're a good friend, and have always been there to help out and chat about things when I've needed it, and I'm not going to sit idly by and watch some idiot cause you problems.
You're one of the good people Andi, and I'm proud to call you my friend.
E
the asses! i'm sorry that crap happened to you.
heh. i had my cousin snooping my site and telling my family was in the porno industry.
lol. people!
go figure.
Hello Andi
Sorry that happened to you. Am I on your SIR (?!) list please?
I don't get chance to read or comment as much as I used to after leaving IBM for a real job. But I would like to keep up to date with your life. Odd isn't it?!
Thanks
Gary
ERGH! That sucks! Emailed you!
Sorry about that! I quit writing in my online journal years ago because I updated once at my parents house. When I went back days later to see who was reading, someone in my parent's hometown had read every single entry. It had to be my dad. I was mortified!!
I came to you when I found your account on another site (can't remember which). I googled Cyndi Lauper and Buckhead and found you. I don't live in Atlanta anymore, but I'd love to be able to keep up with you.
Wow -- that is just horrible. I went protected last year and have never regretted it for a moment.
Good Luck -- Summer
I'm sorry to hear you had to go private. I really enjoyed your daily blog and damn girl you've been through alot and I respect the way you've come through it. Hope the job hunt is going well.
Honey, don't give 'em a fuckin' thought. Live your life and remember that they are reading yours because theirs is so empty.
whoa that sucks.
Please allow me to read??
Hey, I'd just started reading your MDD diary when all of this jazz happened. Sorry about it...I hope all is well, though I was a new reader of your journal and don't completely understand. Seven years. Ugh, well if you don't mind adding me, I'd like to keep reading. My diary is still on MDD though.
Hello Andi! It's Freedoms Wings from MDD. I'm here as Authentic_Woman. As always I'd love to keep up with you, so if that's possible let me know!
Don't get mad at me but I would like to fuck you up the ass in the hallway naked. Good move with that Kelly fucker. What a loser!
I used to be SoapOpera until a kid I fired emailed by URL to my whole customer list. I had written some very uncomplimentary shit about a tv producer here and he read it and made me go out with him and shit and the upshot was I got to be SavonDuJour. I would like to read you, obviously, you sound fascinating. Include me, please on your protected list, but if not, still ok
I'd be very interested to read your site. Having been fired after 19 years at Neiman Marcus because of my journal, I can't totally sympathize. If you check out my site you can see how dangerous I am. Poor NM was afraid I was a bad reflection on the company. Please. Anyway, I'm subbing. Hope you don't mind!
Sweetie I am sooo sorry about that....but like everyone said...who cares....thers nothing to do about it now and if you cant fix it you might as well try to learn from it. There are alot of things I write about in here but the one thing my mom did say that I try to rememeber is that you should never write anything you dont want EVERYONE reading. That has bit me in the ass before so I feel your pain. You to damn smart and strong to let this slow you down. *wink* Anyways...add me if you can I would love to keep in touch with you.
Hi Andi,
I too have been violated @ MDD. By someone I used to work with. Would it be possible for you to add me to your subscriber list? Thanks
I just hit random on the MDD group so you could still be posting or what not. I, too had experience with someone finding me. I was upset so I feel your pain. What was worse was that it was someone I had considered a good friend. Nope... that was not to be and that kind of betrayal is never forgotten. Hope things worked out for you.